Okay, so I've meant to do a blog every Sunday, but managed to completely forget this past weekend, so here it is a bit late (and, as it turns out, slightly more appropriate).
I feel more nervous about teaching this year than I did last year. I feel there's more to lose. I have some semblance of what exactly a 4th grade classroom should look like, a stronger idea about how exactly to teach what needs to be taught and assess afterwards and an overall sense of being more organized. I'm still new, but because it isn't my first year I'm more nervous. I also have a new principal, which makes me nervous. Not because she's a bad principal, but because I want to make sure I do my absolute best.
I suppose you could say I have less illusions about what to expect. Whether that's in terms of how a school runs (or doesn't as the case may be), how a class should be run (or not run as was my case last year) and how to turn oneself into an actual, real teacher, not some facade who appears in control and all-knowing, but is merely just barely getting by (but, then again, it WAS my first year teaching ever!).
Because of these things, I am more nervous and more stressed. I want this year to be better than the previous and while I feel more prepared and ready, I also feel less so. I think that's just because last year is still looming over my head. Not that anyone said I'd done a bad job, but I knew I could have done so much more, been a better teacher and role model for my students.
I suppose this all follows goes under the idea of: "the more you know, the more you care". Worrying doesn't help much though and all I can do is work hard and be the best teacher I can be for my students this year (and the years to come). Anyways Dear Readers, tune in SUNDAY (for reals this time!) for another post, though probably not about teaching!